What to Do If You're Being Canceled, Part II

Should you apologize? Continuing the advice from last week.

A week ago, on the second anniversary of the tweet that changed my life trajectory, I posted the first half of a “deleted chapter” from my forthcoming book, Lawless: The Miseducation of America’s Future Leaders. Here’s the conclusion. —IS

Should You Apologize?

The answer to this incredibly fraught question depends on your specific circumstances and, again, on your goal. If you Google “should I apologize if I’m being canceled,” the overwhelming advice is not to, because it makes you look weak and the sorts of people who cancel others—particularly when piling onto a largely anonymous mob—will just seize on it to increase their attack. Apologies can thus add fuel to the cancelation campaign. Conversely, refusing to apologize, or even doubling-down, may actually gain you support, as silent observers see that it’s your persecutors who are in the wrong. Sterling Mosley’s refusal to apologize for his defense of “The Eyes of Texas” gained him the respect of his fellow students. Dave Chappelle doubled down on his jokes about the excesses of the LGBTQ movement, which only brought him greater acclaim. “To the transgender community,” he said, “I am more than willing to give you an audience, but you will not summon me. I am not bending to anyone’s demands.” Netflix never pulled his 2021 special “The Closer,” which ended up nominated for two Emmys.

Perhaps most importantly, and I can’t say this enough, you shouldn’t apologize if you did nothing wrong. If your apology is perceived as disingenuous, it will backfire and lead to accusations of hypocrisy, as well as alienating your supporters. One apology may invite more attacks as your accusers may keep dredging up items from your past to use against you. So if you do decide you need to apologize, because you’ve actually wronged someone—not just “offended” in the current zeitgeist—make the apology short, heartfelt, and specific. And for God’s sake avoid the new-age language about needing to “do the work,” “educate myself,” and “be better.” That just feeds into the critical-theory therapizing.